ALERT: This is a Public Services Announcement on behalf of those suffering from Closet Introversia.
Individuals living with this condition are needlessly suffering day after day with no end in sight. They are people, just like you, who are currently living in fear of exposure. What would people think? Would anyone understand? How would people treat them if the truth came out?
They could be your brother, your friend, or your neighbor down the street. People you have known for years who are constantly the life of the party, never afraid to make a fool of themselves, and function almost unbelievably well in social situations. I am here to tell you of the burden they bare -- They are Introverts.
Hello. I'm Chelsea, and I am living with Closet Introversia.
From birth, I have been an outgoing creature by nature and have never been one to shy away from the stage. I enjoy attention much more than the average person and make my presence known at almost every possible moment. However, growing up, and all through high school / college, I discovered side effects of my social going-ons that didn't seem to plague those around me in quite the same way. After a mere week's run of a show I was in, or a simple camping trip with friends, I would return stricken with exhaustion and/or illness requiring me to take time off from school and other social settings.
As I have gotten older, the amount of energy exerted in relation to the backlash of exhaustion has decreased significantly and I have spent much time trying to understand why. Recently, I discovered and embraced the truth. I am an Introvert.
The best description of "Introversion" that I have collected is that an Introvert is a person who gives off energy to others in a social situation. They go into a party with a full tank and as they interact with others they are having the fuel siphoned off until they hit empty. In order to refuel, the Introvert must spend some quality alone time, quietly reflecting or engaging in meaningful activities such as reading, writing, painting, yoga, video games, movies, guitar, baking, hiking, driving, sleeping, etc.
Now on the other hand we have Extroverts, people who go into social situations in order to gain fuel, or recharge from the people around them. Both are perfectly acceptable ways to function and for the most part go hand in hand. However, there is a certain stigma around Introverts that makes it difficult for some of us to recharge in peace.
When the title Introvert is assigned it is usually to a person who is quiet, shy, or withdrawn. They are rarely the center of attention and in social situations are usually found on the outskirts of the group. Therefore, when someone is seen at the center of it all, juggling and balancing penguins on their head while dancing on a pogo stick, they are automatically categorized by others as an Extrovert. When that person begins to nosedive after being drained of their fuel supply (see juggling/penguin/pogo stick act), people cannot understand their sudden shift in mood and do not know how to properly give them the space they need. When I have found myself in these situations I have even experienced people going so far as to tell me I'm suddenly being "rude" for no longer being the life of the party -- I'm sorry, I was unaware that was my job.
Since discovering the healing power of alone time and its affects on my soul, I have been more able to healthily balance my social life without losing my "cool" and having the world turn against me. However, I still struggle daily with having to tell people no. Being an Outgoing Introvert is like being a One Stop Truck Stop - people flock to you because you not only fill them up but also entertain them at the same time. You will find you are often on everyone's list of people to see and if you say yes to everything you will quickly learn that you cannot keep up with anything.
If you or a loved one are suffering from Closet Introversia - please - talk about it. Clear the air and help one another understand. The more you treat the condition with loving solitude and creative outlets the more you will be able to continue your honorable role as the ever shining sun in the lives of those around you.
-MP
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